Introduction
The ABC Exercise is rooted in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy’s practice of outlining events in order to understand them and change behavior in the future. By looking at the Activating event, our Beliefs about it, and the Consequences, we can reduce that event’s power over us. When we add a D (Dispute your beliefs) and E (Effective new Belief), we have a tool that changes our beliefs, how we feel about it, and thus we can change how we react.
Urges can feel sudden and overwhelming, but they rarely come out of nowhere. Often, they’re connected to how we interpret what is happening around us. The ABC Exercise helps you pause, break down the situation, and shift your thinking so you can respond in a more helpful way.
Why the ABC Tool Matters
This version of the ABC tool is designed specifically for managing urges. It is based on principles from cognitive behavioral therapy, which teaches us that our beliefs and thoughts affect how we feel and what we do.
When you feel a strong urge, it’s often because of how you’re interpreting an event, not just the event itself. By identifying those beliefs and changing how you think about them, you can reduce the power of the urge and respond in a way that supports your long-term goals.
The ABC tool helps you:
- Recognize the patterns that lead to urges
- Understand how your beliefs affect your emotions and behavior
- Practice replacing unhelpful thoughts with more supportive ones'
- Feel more in control of how you respond
Step-by-Step: Using the ABC Exercise for Urges
Use the worksheet to follow along as you go through each step.
A = Activating Event
What happened just before the urge?
- What was the situation?
- Was anything stressful, upsetting, or triggering?
B = Beliefs
What were you telling yourself in that moment?
- What thoughts came up automatically?
- What did you believe about yourself, the situation, or others?
- Did you have any “musts” or “shoulds”?
C = Consequences
What happened emotionally and physically as a result?
- How did you feel?
- What was the urge?
- Did you act on the urge? Did you resist it?
D = Dispute the Belief
Now ask yourself, was that belief helpful or true?
- Is this thought always accurate?
- What’s another way to look at the situation?
- What might a friend say to you?
E = Effective New Belief
Write a new belief or thought that feels more balanced and useful.
- What can you tell yourself instead?
- How do you feel when you think this new thought?
- What would you do differently with this belief?
Example
- A: My boss yelled at me today in front of my coworkers.
- B: He has no right to embarrass me. It’s not fair. I can’t stand this.
- C: I’m really mad and I want a drink.
- D: Does my boss only yell at me? Is life always fair? Can I stand this without a drink?
- E: My boss yells at everyone eventually. That didn’t feel great, but it’s over. He’s not worth giving up my goals for.
Reflection Questions
- What part of this process felt most helpful?
- How do your urges feel when you stop and examine your beliefs?
- What’s one situation this week where you might try using the ABC tool?
Helpful Links
Helpful Links
Related Tools
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The ABC's
The ABC Model is a good way of understanding how we can help change our feelings and behaviour by challenging our thinking.
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Disrupting Unhelpful Thinking
Disrupting involves challenging and testing our thoughts to gain a more accurate perspective, enabling informed decision-making rather than impulsive reactions.
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Practicing Self Acceptance
People struggling with behaviours of concern often feel a great deal of shame, self-blame and guilt. They may judge themselves harshly and beat themselves up about their behaviour.