[Guest blog post by SMART Facilitator Kelly Scullin, CPCC, SHRM-SCP]
The voices inside our heads: some cheer us on, others criticize, pressure, or tempt us. In the moment, these voices can feel like the whole truth of who we are—but they’re not. We are their observers. One way to work with them is through personification: giving them names, faces, or qualities so we can recognize them, step back, and choose how to respond. Come with me: I’ll introduce two of my own inner characters, how they showed up in a hard moment, and a practice you can try in your own life.
Meet My Urge Voice: The Arsonist
She’s dramatic. Intense. Persuasive. She rages almost instantaneously, match in hand, eyes blazing. Her signature line? “The bridges I burn will light my path.” Not cool. She believes destruction is power. Everything is absolute. Nothing is relative. When she shows up, I’ve learned to pause and get curious:
Her fire is a signal, not a solution.
Meet My Recovery Voice: The Humpback Whale
She is vast. Ancient. Slow to rise, but when she does, her presence fills the horizon. She moves with gravity and grace, holding both depth and buoyancy at once. She reminds me that stillness is not weakness, and surfacing for air is not failure but survival. The Whale carries certain truths:
Where The Arsonist burns hot and fast, the Whale steadies.
A Cautionary Tale and the Whale Call
Recently, I felt the sting of a canceled plan. Someone I care about chose novelty over our friendship, sending a text that they had “double-booked.” It wasn’t just about that weekend—it echoed similar let-downs. Whether it was their intention, the subtext—the impact—landed hard: “You don’t matter.” The Arsonist stormed in, match in hand. She wanted to burn the bridge, to ensure I’d never risk that kind of hurt again. But then the Whale—my Recovery Voice—rose to the surface. Slowly. Deliberately. She reminded me:
With her guidance, I chose differently. I set a boundary. I spoke with clarity rather than combustion. The ache remained, but I felt the relief of responding from alignment instead of destruction. The Whale helped me see that what hurt most wasn’t the canceled plan—it was the absence of accountability. When someone sidesteps honesty or avoids owning their impact, it brushes hard against my values. Accountability is how we stay in integrity with each other, and without it, the ground between us feels shaky.
EMPOWER: A Practice for the Recovery Voice
The Arsonist will always offer me a match. But the Whale reminds me there is another way.
By personifying my Urge Voice and my Recovery Voice so vividly, I’ve made them distinctive and clear. That clarity matters: when inner strife flares up, these characters become useful guides. I can recognize when fire storms in, what values are in jeopardy, and call on the Whale’s steady presence instead.
That’s what the practice of EMPOWER looks like: calling in my Recovery Voice on purpose. I created the EMPOWER acronym to make space between my impulse and my response—to slow down, listen for the wisdom of my Inner Leader, and choose a response rooted in clarity rather than combustion. Here’s how it works:
In my story, EMPOWER sounded like this:
Your Turn: Who’s Walking Beside You?
We all carry different inner voices. Some push us toward urges, while others quietly offer steadiness and wisdom. Personifying them makes these voices easier to notice—and easier to choose between:
Though reflecting and naming them aloud with others can dampen the activity of the brain's emotional center, while increasing activity in the brain’s center for logical and executive functions, you don’t have to share your answers with anyone. Simply taking this first step of sketching them out—in words, drawings, or symbols—can begin to shift the balance.
This practice is infinite and renewable. You carry it with you wherever you are. You are not broken. You are, and always have been, naturally creative, resourceful, and whole. Each of us is worthy of noticing our Urge Voices for the cautionary signals they bring, and of calling on the deep agency of our Recovery Voices to chart a path forward.
A Note for Neurodivergent Readers
Not everyone experiences inner voices the same way. If you don’t “hear” an inner critic or guide, or if you live with aphantasia (difficulty picturing images), you can still use this practice. Collect data instead: notice the emotions, physical sensations, and patterns that show up when you feel pulled by urges or supported in recovery. Then create a simple archetype—a sketch, collage, or digital avatar—and give it a name you can call on in the moment.
Prompts to help you track:
These notes become the raw material for shaping your own cast of inner characters. Whether they live in words, drawings, or symbols, they’re yours to name and call on—wherever you are.